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Smallville

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SMALLVILLEEmo now comes in blonde with Oliver Queen gambling away his fortune at a Metropolis casino.  Still distraught over having disposed of Lex Luthor, he encounters a smokin’ hot Asian chick wearing a cheongsam dress that barely covers an elaborate dragon tattoo stretching from her back down her thigh.  Known as “Roulette,” she offers him a choice of what’s beneath three metal decanters.  He chooses the one that houses a red pill and decides to indulge. 

Next thing you know, Oliver finds himself – and his snazzy white suit – trapped in a coffin with a flashlight.  Wow.  How Kill Bill Vol. 2 is this scenario?!  Ollie sees another coffin emblazoned with the name “Alexander Luthor” and busts it open, seeing a pair of speakers.  The voice emanating from the speakers must be reading from the Saw handbook, indulging in a very Jigsaw-esque dialogue with Ollie about the lives he’s destroyed.  The voice asks him if he’s had his rabies shot and things go from Saw  to Cujo in a matter of seconds as Ollie hides in a car from the dog, and the doors lock themselves.  Cue the possessed tractor trailer from Maximum Overdrive which plows into Oliver’s Cujo mobile.


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